How to Adopt a Practice of Self Love and Still Build Your Relationship

Ahh, love. It’s sweet, comforting, and easy to get completely wrapped up in. It feels so good to enter a relationship and find someone with whom you want to spend every waking moment. For that reason, it’s easy to let your self-love practice take the back burner. You might be wondering why you need to practice self-love when your significant other already showers you with affection. Self-love will allow you to stay true to yourself, make sure your needs are met, and even strengthen your relationship! So how do you adopt a practice of self-love while in a relationship? Keep reading to find out!

Adopt a Practice of Self Love - young woman sitting on a rock amongst mountains

How do you Adopt a Practice of Self-Love While in a Relationship?

Make Time for Yourself

I know it’s tempting to stay snuggled up with your S/O binging your favorite Netflix show. But making time for yourself while in a relationship is extremely important. Having some solo time allows you to take a deep breath, check in with your needs and evaluate your well-being.

For some people, this needs to happen every day. For others, every once in a while is perfectly adequate. You know yourself best, so evaluate how often you need some me-time to check in and recharge. Need a day away? Take it. Need a whole week? Consider it done! I know it seems counterintuitive, but taking the time you need to be alone will help balance and improve your relationship. You can only be a good partner if you are doing well yourself!

Keep Growing as an Individual

It’s nice to get lost in daydreams about the future with your partner. Whether that’s organizing a trip, buying a house together, or planning your wedding. While it’s perfectly fine to have shared goals, don’t forget to prioritize your own! Remember all the things you wanted to do before you met them. Your own goals should be at the top of your list. Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to forget about your aspirations. Want to run that marathon? Take a solo trip to Paris? Change careers? Whatever it is, go for it! Creating goals for yourself is the ultimate practice of self-love. By working on self-improvement, you’ll open up a new world that can enhance your quality of life and bring joy into your relationship.

Maintain Friendships

Don’t go MIA as soon as you meet your new flame. Sure, you can miss a few weekends with your pals for date nights. But don’t make it a habit to always cancel on your friends to stay in with your beau. Even in long-term relationships, ditching your friends for your S/O isn’t healthy for you or your partner.

Friendships are good for the soul and are an integral part of your practice of self-love while in a relationship. Don’t wait for your friends to organize the next margarita night. Take matters into your own hands and reach out first! Reignite old connections and check-in with friends you haven’t spoken to in forever. Maintaining friendships allows healthy distance from your partner and opportunity for life-long memories with your crew.

Set Boundaries With Your Partner

When you are in a healthy, supportive relationship, it should be easy to talk about the boundaries you want to set for yourself. Your partner might be thinking the same thing, and having an open discussion about boundaries is a great way to nourish both of you. Establishing boundaries allows you to set expectations, define what you are comfortable with and how you want to be treated.

To set effective boundaries, you have to ask yourself what you need and talk openly with your partner. Boundaries will look different for each person. They are for you, and only you, so don’t be concerned about anyone else when you’re setting them! It’s also important to make it known when your boundaries are not respected.

Resentment can build if you don’t speak up about something that makes you uncomfortable in your relationship. So make sure to communicate openly with your partner and ask them to do the same. The practice of self-love can be as simple as setting a clear line between what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship.

Connect with Your feelings

An integral part of adopting a practice of self-love is connecting with and acknowledging your feelings. Whether they’re good or bad, it’s important to engage with your emotions, so you can address them and move forward in a healthy way. Have you ever been so angry at your partner, but you don’t know why? If so, there may be something else going on that you need to acknowledge. Write out your feelings in a reflection journal and allow yourself the space to analyze your moods and emotions.

Remember to be kind to yourself and not judge these feelings. Instead, congratulate yourself that you were able to recognize and connect with your emotions, it’s not always easy to do!

If you find yourself in a negative thinking pattern, take a moment to pause and ask yourself why you feel this way. Can you find a positive outlook on the situation? Or do you need a moment to sit with these feelings? Accepting and acknowledging your feelings allows you to be more compassionate towards yourself and experience self-love which we all need a little more of!

Just like relationships, adopting a practice of self-love takes commitment, nourishment, and dedication. Along with that, it also brings acceptance, happiness, and forgiveness. By practicing self-love, you will not only develop a greater, richer relationship with yourself but also with your partner.

Two shoes tied together to show the five most important things in a real relationship.

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